Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
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