So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Just cropdusted the office
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
