girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
