ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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