Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
