I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
