Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
