# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
