I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Of course I have a pirate flag
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
