Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize
