I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
