I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
