he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
