so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
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