her vagine was all disorganized.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
