dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Randomize
