so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
