I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
You were trust falling into bushes
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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