Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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