i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Randomize
