sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
