my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
