No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
