Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
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