Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
