I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
