Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I still have a little drunk in my system
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
