talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Randomize