How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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