At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
