Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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