one two three fourrrrnication!
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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