Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
