What did we do last night that was yellow?
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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