Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
