these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
