I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
