Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
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