Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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