I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
