I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
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