Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Randomize
