Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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