how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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