I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
pop tarts are not kleenex
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
