So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Randomize
