I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
