Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
