so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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