the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
